other folks weddings: {malia & michelle}

i'm thrilled to feature this gorgeous wedding that took place last year on september 25...a lovely desert wedding at the ever so fabulous ace hotel in palm springs.  disclaimer:  i've known malia {in suit} since the early 1990's and i'm over the moon that she found michelle, the girl for her.  this relaxed, joyous wedding is full of love and fun... and i adore michelle's vintage style and yes, malia is woman who wears men's clothes...and wears them well! so get yourself a tasty beverage that reminds you of the relaxed summer vibe that this wedding emits, think sunny california desert thoughts and toast to malia and michelle!

how long were you together before you got married?

we have known each since the mid 90s but were a couple for about two years before we got married.

did you diy anything?  what did you leave to vendors?

we did the save the dates ourselves...our invitations were done custom by kimberly austin at austinpress in san francisco.  our beautiful flowers and the decor were done by luna at arrangements design in palm springs.  both ladies were a complete treat to work with and really understood what we wanted!

tell me about the day{s}.

we got married on sept 25 2011 at the ace hotel in palm springs...we love going there year round so we thought it would be perfect to have the wedding there...lots of happy times there for us...we had about 120 friends and family from all parts of the world join...we pretty much took over the hotel for the week! it felt really special to see all our loved ones in one giant magical place. the day of the wedding was filled with swimming, eating, the ceremony, and lots of dancing and more swimming! and a ton of love!!!

how did you approach the planning process?

we have a wonderful friend heather who can arrange parties with her eyes closed!so thankfully she helped us! also taneka at the ace hotel helped with arranging everything dealing with the space and vendors and the delicious food!!! 

what was important?

music!!! luckily the wonderful zach cowie lent us his talent for the night! no one wanted to stop dancing! it was awesome because the space had a private pool so people could dance and jump in the pool too.  zach really took time out of his crazy music world life to understand what we wanted to dance to and it turned out perfect!

what was your favorite part of the day?
the unreal amount of love that everyone brought...sounds cheesy but it was really so sweet...

one piece of advice?

just really enjoy each part of the planning and relax on the day of...it goes by really quick!

{photographer: eyla cuenca}

{dj: zach cowie}

{flowers & decor: luna at arrangements design}

and the band played on for diane...

a good friend of patty's lost her battle with breast cancer this weekend.  she was only 31.  and while i didn't know diane very well, this loss seems especially profound...diane was such a sweet and caring soul.  i always looked forward to her posts on facebook, as inevitably there were pictures of her in all her vintage fashion glory.  she ran a magazine about vintage fashion called zelda and also threw fabulous vintage parties called wit's end.  

we saw her last in march, when we were in new york for the hit so hard premiere. she was in amazing spirits and health, and one would never know she was sick...i honestly thought she was in remission and had it "beat."  i'm so grateful we made time to see her while we were in new york as she was a good friend to patty...

my heart goes out to her boyfriend, friends and family...i especially can't imagine what her mother is going through now...experiencing the loss of one's child, whether six or thirty-one...i don't even have the words...

with all the breast cancer awareness and charities, it just seems simply mind boggling that we lose such young and vivacious souls to this disease...

so please send love & light diane's way and cherish your loved ones...

mamas who inspire me {jillian lauren}

i was hoping to feature a mama a week, but mamas are well...busy!  although i've asked several mamas to participate, i knew that this might not be a weekly feature!  so i was thrilled to find a reply from my friend jillian lauren.  i've known jillian for a long time, but it wasn't until motherhood that we really got to know each other...jillian was a mama before i was, so i was able to watch her amazing journey unfold before we took our first steps towards having a child...


ever since i was young, i always thought adoption would be my way to motherhood...and although i gave birth to beatrice, i still feel that adoption is a beautiful and amazing gift and it could definitely be a way for us to continue to grow our family.  so jillian's story is especially inspiring to me as an adoptee and an adoptive mother.  jillian is a ridiculously talented woman and wicked smart.  i love that she is brutally honest about motherhood...the ups and downs...that means so much to me.  i am constantly striving for perfection, but in motherhood that's not possible.  what wonderful gifts jillian is able to give her son: love, honesty, humility and compassion.  and what a wonderful motherhood inspiration she is for us...

have you always wanted to be a mama?

Yes! But I definitely went through some dark times in my life when I doubted that I'd ever be able to pull it off. It took me longer than most people for me to really feel like I could properly care for myself. As soon as I had a basic handle on that, I knew I was ready for my family to grow.

how many kids do you have?  tell me about him?

I have one son named Tariku Moon. He's 3 1/2 and he's already gunning for world domination. This kid is a force of nature. I generally end my days weeping with exhaustion. He loves rock music and airplanes and dance parties and anything fast and dangerous. Come to think of it, I could describe his dad with that same sentence...

tell me about your adoption story.

 Scott and I tried to get pregnant for years and it got to a point where I was at a crossroads. I didn't want to continue down the road of fertility treatments and medical intervention. I just couldn't do it to my body anymore. I was adopted as a newborn and adoption has always been something I was interested in doing, so looking into it seemed like the next logical step. I met a woman who had adopted a child from Ethiopia and as soon as I looked at her photo album I just knew on some metaphysical level that my child was there. 

I did a bunch of research and read everything I could get my hands on and then Scott and I began the adoption process. it took about two years from the time we started to the day we got on a plane to Ethiopia to pick up our son. It was the most frustrating and wonderful and painful and incredible and mind-blowing time of my life. Until now that is. Motherhood blows it out of the water on all those fronts.

how do you balance your work/life load?

That's the million dollar question. I guess I never seem to find a satisfactory balance. There aren't enough hours in the day to be the kind of mom and the kind of artist I want to be. But both parenting and making art are such integral parts of who I am that I'm willing to keep banging my head against the wall trying to find that ever-elusive balance. 

what is your favorite thing about being a mama?  how is your life different?

My favorite thing about being a mama is my son's laugh. I've never had moments of such pure joy as when we're collapsing with laughter together. My other favorite thing about being a mama is how much I surprise myself every day- both in the ways I succeed and in the ways I fail and am forced to try again. 

How is my life different? How is my life not different? Absolutely everything about my life has been transformed by motherhood. Even the things that aren't obvious. The lens through which I look at the world has been profoundly altered. 

 

does "alone time" exist for you?  how do you take care of yourself?

Alone time does exist for me. I insist on it. Scott is a musician, so when he's out of town it's definitely harder. But usually his one-on-one time with Tariku is in the morning, so I'll use those hours to go exercise- to go for a run or a hike and just let the early morning quiet sink in. I also try to get to the occasional yoga or dance class- not as regularly as I'd like, but I take what I can get and it makes such a difference.

tell me about your job?  how does it affect you as a mother?  and how does motherhood affect your work?

I'm a writer and a performer and I think that in some ways it's a great job to have as a parent and in others it feels practically impossible. I often work from home, so I get to see T during the day- have lunch with him or give him a kiss when he takes a nap. I wouldn't trade it, but it can be hard to work with a toddler screaming for you at the bottom of the stairs. But he's used to it by now and so am I!

When I'm performing it's harder because it impinges on our evening hours together and I feel like that's generally the time when we're most connected. But it only ever happens in short bursts. The up side of being in the arts is that when Scott and I are around, we're around more than most parents with normal jobs. And when I have down time, I make sure to spend almost all of it with him. I have very little social life and that's fine with me. 

who/what inspires you as a mother?

I am inspired by my mom friends and other mom bloggers (like you!) every day. I think that our honesty and openness with each other as moms is such an essential component of feeling connected and staving off the loneliness. I'm particularly inspired these days by other moms who are fighting to make good creative work and to get it out there in the world. 

what other projects do you have besides work & family?

I don't really have any other projects! I've been knitting the same dog sweater for three years. I guess I have waves of being into cooking and gardening, but those things fall by the wayside more often than not. 

tell me about a typical day in your life.

I usually wake before the boys and slip out to run or do a quick early-morning yoga class. Then it's back for breakfast and the morning get-ready routine, which can seem like it takes anywhere from 15 minutes to about 12 hours on a bad day. Then I write from 9-4 and take over with Tariku after nap. We go to the park or ride bikes or jump on the trampoline. Anything to try to wear him out and insure a reasonable bedtime (good luck with that). Then it's dinner, bath, books, bed. We've got a real rock and roll lifestyle around here. 

wanna find out more about jillian:
website

twitter

blog

today mom contributor

the nest contributor

music mondays {rock and roll camp for girls part ii}

this is so cute & amazing!  i laughed and ok, i got a little teary...

{credit here}

mamas who inspire me {jorjee douglass}

i've been wanting to start a little series about mamas who inspire me...inspiration comes in so many forms, from so many places: mamas i know in "real life," mamas from around the blogosphere, straight mamas, queer mamas, single mamas, married mamas, working mamas, stay at home mamas, work from home mamas, ap mamas, crunchy mamas, adoptive mamas, birth mamas, butch mamas, older mamas, younger mamas...i take some inspiration from across the board...i look to those who have joined the mama club before me for guidance and support...so i wanted to find out more about motherhood from them and share some of these women with you...


first up is one of my best friends....i've known jorjee douglass since the early 90's when we both lived in san francisco, rummaging through thrift stores, going to rock shows, and enjoying the pre-dot-com wild, artsy and free frontier that it was.  now that we have both found ourselves in los angeles, i'm not sure how jorjee even found time to respond to me...she wears so many hats: wife, mama, make-up artist to the stars, a founding member of the citizen's band, singer/songwriter, fashion icon, blogger...but i remember when she told me she was pregnant and how excited i was...she was probably one of my first friends to have a baby and somehow that made it seem more real for me...jorjee, being one of the most creative and fun people i know, is one of those mamas that brings love, light, magic and humor to her family and to everyone she meets.


have you always known you wanted to be a mama?
yes!  i have always known i'd be a mama, but coming from an overly large family of eight, i always thought i would adopt a child.  i used to dream of being adopted and treated like a queen. i never had the urge to have my own until it was almost too late--i was 40!

 {jorjee eight months pregnant performing with the citizen's band}

tell me about your kids.

i have one girl.  she just turned four.  her name is maude mary feathers boddie.  i can't just tell you about her without making this 100 pages long!  she is the smartest lady i know!  i love her and respect her so much, and that's just putting it mildly!  i wish i were her...ha ha, i don't really, but i'm just blown away by her awesomeness daily!

{maude, at two years old,  following in her mamas footsteps painting pretty faces}

how did you find out you were pregnant?

while i was at work.  i lived in new york at the time, but i was on a job in los angeles {payless shoes commercial!} and i could just tell!  it went something like this:  "i think i'm preggers i'm gonna go buy a test at cvs on the way to work" and i did.  when i had a break, i walked across the street and took the test in the public bathroom at peet's coffee.  positive!

since you are a working mama, how do you balance your work/life load?

i don't really balance it...i live like a junkie, i fill myself up as much as i can with my daughter and family when i have time off and don't see that much of my friends, that's my trade off.  but i have great quality time with maude.  when i work the days are 12-14 hours so it gets hard!  i try to arrange for her to come to set after school so we can hang out for at least an hour.

what is your favorite thing about being a mama?

i'm not really doing anything that differently...i think i've always been a mama!

does "alone time" exist for you?  how do you take care of yourself?

i go to a korean spa and soak every few months...i stay up late and watch bad tv or i get up before everyone else in the house.

tell me about your job?  how does it affect you as a mother?

i'm a make-up artist, so my daughter looks pretty all the time!  {laughs!}

who/what inspires you as a mama?

maude inspires me and her future well being.  come to think of it, i'm very inspired by my sister-in-law, liz.  she can do everything and does it in an awesome witchy way.  hello glitter play doh!

what other projects do you have besides work & family?

i am a founding member of the citizen's band, a performance troupe in new york...i also write things...and i've just started a hippie band collective with my husband and your wife called canyon people...we're making honest dirty rock'n'roll for all with a rotating cast of guest star characters!

wanna find out more about jorjee:
twitter
make up ghost blog
hello giggles contributor

music mondays {rock and roll camp for girls}

this past week, patty has been teaching drums to girls at the rock & roll camp for girls...she is so passionate about this.  it's an amazing program that teaches girls about being in a band...everything from how to play their instrument to how to silk screen their band t-shirts.  music being a fairly male dominated field, i think this is so inspiring!  girls are so often taught be quiet and polite, and rocking out is the opposite!!  girls also often lack the self-esteem necessary to really put themselves out there...and i love what the rock camp is doing...really giving girls the tools necessary and the confidence to play and perform music.  their tagline is "empowering girls through music education."

adult women instructors teach the girls for one week, and then at the end of the week they have a showcase so all the bands can perform.  this year, patty had her friend linda perry come down to perform and give a song writing workshop...it was really powerful...the girls were blown away!

i didn't get to see the showcase, unfortunately {sleeping baby & rock show don't go so well together!}, but i was there when the show ended and got to see the beaming parents and thrilled kids exit the venue...there were so many smiles and proud moments and kid after kid with their moms came up to patty & the other instructors and told them what an amazing opportunity the camp was for them...

what an fantastic program to support the esteem-building and empowerment of young women!  they also offer adult ladies camps if you are in the los angeles area that help fund scholarships for girls to go to camp.  be sure to like them on facebook and follow them on twitter to find out when the next camp is and how you can help!

{photo credit here}

music mondays...well sort of...

hmmm...will bea follow in patty's footsteps??  this was taken a few weekends ago at a friend's two year birthday party...

music mondays {sia sings hole}

ok...so this is a terrible video and the guy singing along is kind of funny, but i had to post a video from the LA premiere of our movie, hit so hard.  after the screening, some amazing & talented friends performed with patty...this is a video of sia covering miss world!  patty & eric are playing with her...linda perry also covered violet!

it was a really fun night and i managed to go, wearing a sleeping beatrice with noise reduction headphones!  i stressed out for weeks about whether i should go or not...and honestly didn't decide for sure that i was going until 15 minutes before the event...beatrice never took the bottle, so i haven't really been away from her for very long.  which, honestly has really not been a problem.  i'm perfectly happy staying at home with her!  we have lots of fun outings during the day, so we're both pretty tired at night.  so i never felt like i was "missing out" on anything...until this event.  since it was the LA premiere of the movie, i really wanted to try to attend...hometown screening an all!  and we also announced that the film was picked up for distribution...and on top of all that, the amazing performance.  so i really felt like i'd like to attend.  

i was really concerned that i was "being a bad mom" by keeping beatrice out so late...i posted on a few of my favorite attachment parenting mom groups and a few of them suggested to just bring her...wear her so i can nurse her to sleep...i also thought about having her sleep in the car with a sitter so i could just run out and nurse her if she woke up, but honestly that seemed crazy to me...i figured bea would much rather just be with me, nursing or asleep in the ergo...

but really it couldn't have worked out better.  she ended up napping from 6-8pm, we left for the movie around 8:30pm and then hung out in patty's dressing room with toys...a few friends who also have kids were there visiting with us.  then she fell asleep in the ergo {while i was nursing her} at about 9:30pm...i then put on her headphones and watched the performance from the side stage backstage.  usually it's not as loud backstage as the speakers are facing the crowd.  she slept through the whole thing!  didn't even flinch...

this was a pretty big event, it takes *a lot* to get me out, so i don't think we'll try it again anytime soon...um, let's just say never...but i'm glad i went...and i guess when she's older i can tell her that she was there!  

rock & roll elegance...new design company

i'm doing something different for music mondays this week....i'm featuring awesome music-inspired wedding invitations.

how amazing are these invites & save the dates created by new design firm riot structure ? the save the dates are actual 45's that they re-purposed and added their own design to...and the invite harkens back to the extra cool rock posters back in the 60's & 70's...

well, design duo katie & josh designed these super cool invites for their own wedding. after they pulled off that event, they decided to make it a living & launched riot structure design firm with a third partner, mike. katie & josh just ooze style & taste...don't you want their eyes on your invites?

they have also done a rock doc {full disclosure: they did the graphics for HIT SO HARD, the documentary about patty} and album covers...they definitely take your interests into consideration when designing. for example, they did a bookmark style invite for some avid readers...

want to have your wedding invites designed by riot structure? they would like to do a creative design for an aesthetically adventurous couple. is that you? just mention steady happy and get 10% off your design fee {not printing}.

{photo credit: riot structure}

music mondays {deep dark robot}

loving deep dark robot right now...and this video is pretty freaking hot. enjoy!

music mondays {the belle brigade}

remember last week when i asked you what you were listening to? well, i got some awesome suggestions, among them one suggestion from my friend nicole, whose band the cold and lovely i also featured last week...

take a listen to los angeles based the belle brigade...great music, awesome name, a brother & sister duo, and the brother is a red head, to boot! love them...such good summer in los angeles tunes...makes me want to open the windows, turn up the volume and dance around with beatrice...

oh, and the video made me cry...

music mondays...tell me what you are listening to...**

ok, it's music monday and i got nothing, folks! tell me what you

are listening to lately...kids music ok, too!

**update: after i posted this, i got a link to this awesome song from my friends nicole & meghan. folks, please check out the cold and lovely...this song is so sexy...

{photo credit: 1. I choose the music, a photo by I HaveGot,aCanon on Flickr
2. andrea alseri}

music mondays {the go-go's}

coming of age in the eighties, the go-go's were one of the most influential bands in my youth. and women who rock are amazing...most of my music posts are about rocking women, so...

as the go-go's are about to embark on tour to celebrate the 30th anniversary of BEAUTY & THE BEAT, i thought i'd plug a campaign to get the go-go's recognized by the rock and roll hall of fame in their upcoming "women who rock" exhibit. for me, and many others i know, the go-go's DEFINE women who rock...

this post lays it out amazingly well, but let me just sum it up: the go-go's are the only all female band who wrote their own songs & played their own instruments, who had a #1 hit for six weeks. and they are not included in this exhibit of women rockers. a pretty jaw-dropping oversight, no? they should be lauded and recognized for their achievements and deserve a spot in the rock and roll hall of fame "women who rock" exhibit!!

so what can you do...check out the suggestions here! go forth & rock!

steady as she grows {six months! & expert traveler}

this past month we've spent traveling with the documentary about patty called hit so hard. the documentary was made by our friends at the ebersole hughes company. it premiered at south by southwest{sxsw} in austin, texas, then it had it's new york premiere at new directors/new films. since the topic is pretty close to home {my spouse!}, my role was arranging interviews, getting music clearance and fundraising {we raised over $22,000 in 30 days on kickstarter! here's to the power of crowd funding & social media, but that's another post}...

so, we decided to head to austin & new york since it was the first time the movie was showing...needless to say, i was a little nervous about traveling so much with baby beatrice. but she did really great. many folks told me to go for it...since it's so much easier to travel with the little ones when they are "portable"!

i'm so glad we did! we had a really great time and beatrice did great. it was wild going from the staggering heat of austin to the frigid cold of new york, but beatrice was a trooper. since she won't take the bottle, she had to stick with me, so i wore her to the screenings. she slept through the first one in austin...then the next one in austin and the two in new york, we just did the intros and spread out a blanket in the movie lobby and played with her toys during the movie. the time change in new york worked in our favor...the first screening was at 6pm, so it was really only 3pm california time, so bea was still in great spirits...

in new york, there was a pretty big press line, and since beatrice was awake, she was with me...she's already a star! here she is on stage with us during the q&a:

so, now we're home & we don't plan on traveling again for a while...the film is going to other fests {i'll keep you posted or for up-to-the-minute updates, you can follow the film on twitter or like it on facebook}, but bea and i are going to stay home for a while and work on some other projects! more to come...

{photo credits here}

music mondays {sierra swan}

i've been following sierra swan on twitter and she's been posting tidbits and videos...and i'm hooked. i love her voice, it's so velvety and sensual...i kinda get lost & dreamy when i hear her. and to top it off, she's a mama to an adorable little guy. hooray for the mama's...

if you are lucky enough to live in los angeles, she has a show coming up at the end of the month: january 31 at the hotel cafe...since beatrice won't take the bottle, i don't think i'll be able to make it...

follow her on twitter for the magic...

music mondays {karen elson}

i first heard karen elson sing at a citizens band performance in los angeles. i was pretty blown away, i had no idea she could sing! and loving red heads, i knew had to hear more when her album dropped. well, i wasn't disappointed.

the video, directed by my beautiful friends, the belles of the black diamond field, is gorgeous & haunting...

music mondays {anna waronker}

i'm loving this song right now....anna waronker was the lead singer of that dog back in the nineties and she's back with another solo album. really excited to hear what she's got in store... album not available until feb 8, but be sure to check it out!

music mondays {psychic friend}

ok...shameless promotion. patty has several projects in the works and this is one of them. psychic friend. she's in the band with will schwartz & bo boddie...

my favorite song is 'once a servant.' enjoy!

go now & like them on facebook, follow them on twitter & look for them coming to a city near you...

{artwork by lena wolff}

music mondays {mumford & sons}

i saw these guys on another blog & for the love of god i can't remember who introduced this band to me...so my apologies...

but ever since i read about this band, i've been listening to them...mumford & sons have a great sound {gotta love a banjo!} and i'm especially enjoying the acoustic bookshop sessions, from which i posted above...nice soundtrack for the rain we've been having here in los angeles...

music mondays {renee & jeremy}

in the morning, beatrice loves to have a dance party...we put on music and i dance with her until she falls asleep for her morning nap. one of her favorites is home by edward sharpe & the magnetic zeros, but lately, we've been listening to a children's station on pandora. i keep bookmarking the same artist over & over again, so i decided to check them out...renee & jeremy.

they are not new to the kids' music scene, their first album, it's a big world, came out in 2007...but i am new to the kids' music scene, so i'm just now learning of them. the songs i kept bookmarking on pandora are from it's a big world, and they are all really beautiful, loving, sweet songs...their voices together give me goosebumps. you absolutely do not need children to enjoy these tunes...but being a parent just enhances the already lovely listening experience...

i'm excited to really listen to their other album, c'mon, of which this is the title song...and who can resist little drummer boy...i had to download that one right away!

parents & non-parents alike: enjoy!